Everything
in life is literal. It becomes metaphorical as soon as Spinoza gets back from
the hardware store. Metaphors are the distortions that we harness to bone to
animate the dead. I examine each feeling, each perception, for the energy of
resurrection. The taste of salt. The syntax of lightning. If I sense the
agitations of injury, I move toward the pain until I can see it more clearly.
President
Obama leans his head back to avoid the feathers of the headdress worn by Joseph
Medicine Crow, the last surviving warrior chief of the Crow Tribe of Montana,
as he drapes the Presidential Medal of Freedom around the old man’s neck.
Joseph passed away yesterday at age 102. This is his obituary. It attracted my
attention while playing with our cat, Athena. She likes to chase a peacock
feather whenever I slide it under a sheet of newspaper. Obama squints his eyes. Joe wears a pair of
glasses. His grandmother’s brother, White Man Runs Him, was a scout for Lt.
Col. George Armstrong. “I always told people when you meet Joe Medicine Crow,
you’re shaking hands with the 19th century,” said Herman Viola,
curator emeritus at the Smithsonian Institution’s National Museum of American
Indians.
“The
Mirage of Needles” is a poem by René Char. I get lost there for a moment.
Daylight hangs from spars of amber. The day sails into biography. I bring a
limestone piano and an old Scrabble game discovered in the closet of a deserted
Kansas motel to the augmentation of this paragraph. Bouillon cures adjectives.
I feel ultramarine. Simultaneity sweetens hieroglyphs of coffee. An exhibition
of thunder drinks itself in mid-air. I don’t have time for doctrine. I walk on
the laughter of banks. Each time that I think of money an ox comes alive on my
tongue. There is no punishment but the sun.
Syzygy
sizzles in zyzzyva. Ninety five points.
I
study a waterfall. The roar of white water haloed by mist floating at its outer
edges. I’m fascinated by the margin between mass and energy. There also exists
an intersection between consciousness and language.
When
an ocean wave recedes, it leaves behind it traces of its agitations in the
sand. This is called writing. There’s a bump that confirms the incident of
cleavage and a robin that sings and weather and acceleration. Later in life, we
discover that time writes its chronicles and epitaphs on our faces and the
bananas are good and rubber is rational and the emotions that people leave
behind are ghosts of pathos hungry for our understanding.
The
savor of twilight sleeps in the somersaults of a king. My thoughts unfold like
rolls of canvas. I feel the grace of assemblage in the headlights of necessity.
I’ve had a number of jobs over the years and been fired from most of them, but one
thing I’ve learned is that a cup of coffee never smells as good as when a herd
of buffalo stampede through the unconscious of a dictionary.
I
never stand on ceremony. I always clatter when I walk. I bring in another haul
of anatomies to examine. Daffodils, opinions, sensations. Everything in the
world has a structure. This includes experience and candy. Yesterday I had a
sensation that weighed 173 pounds and bristled with spoons. It was red and
impersonal and too variegated to represent in pastels and so I wrapped it in
tinfoil and sent it to the British Museum. It went on exhibit as a grizzly bear
and that was that.
I
have feelings that are too large and nebulous for description. Most of my
feelings are too large and nebulous for description. This is why I feel such an
affinity for zippers. The specificity of the zipper is comforting. So are
smears and cemeteries.
The
highway arrives a little damaged but without any clear objective in sight. We
can hear someone laughing in an upturned car at the side of the road. Pain has
a way of harnessing itself to the sparkle of stimulation. You can see it in the
eyes of the dying.
Emotional
pain is itself a form of stimulation. An incitement, a spur. People glitter to
play the guitar and when they do auroras of sound make the air turn spectral. It
takes a lot of sweat and nerve to build a behavior that works for you. You
cannot mimic desire. But you can take it into the clouds and break it into
words.
And
what is reality?
Stimulus.
Any
friendly energy stirring the blood into odor. Any energy at all. Negative
energy is good too. I don’t mean to be orange. I just like velvet. I like to
express myself with arms. In writing. In gallantry. In gulps. In oak and
exhalation. Like saws or flies. A place to put your wrinkles. Old temptations.
The hospitality of silver. The serious hurry of a lucidity whistling dimes of
stepladder lime.
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