I feel a comedy of
feathers emerge from my skin. I become a bird. I become an inference. I become
a direct object and an intermediary cabbage.
And I don’t like
cabbage. That’s how serious I am. That’s I ridiculous I am. I don’t even know
for sure what “I am” means. I is an overtone. A suggestion. A bird. A cabbage.
A cabbage bird.
Identity spurts
from the sternum and prickles with weird coordinates. Heaven sits cockeyed by
the edge of a cliff. We must leap aboard when we get the chance. Meanwhile,
there is soup, and litmus paper, and cloth. Cloth may refer to clothing, or it
may just be cloth. Cloth.
We fold our desires
and pack them into our hearts and head for Paris. We arrive in time to see Henri
Poincaré ride a swan down the Champs-Élysées.
I like the
thickness of syntax when it spins in the water and makes the sentence move
forward through a cloud of midnight postage.
The fork is a
utensil. The spoon is a postulate. But it is the knife that comes to a point.
I inflate my
frustration until it reveals the muscular wallpaper of a meticulous opinion.
I explore the face
of a genial distance. There’s an elegy on the loose and I want to see it before
it disappears into a good mood. The road is gravel, though I suspect you
already knew that. You can hear it crunch under the tires of these words. Which
aren’t even round. They’re oval. This causes the sentence to wobble, and go up
and down, as if at sea.
I remember an old
Swedish church on the prairie, with a foundation of stone. It had long since
ceased to function as a church, but was its door continued to stay open. The
wind flung it back and forth. It would creak open then slam shut as if
invisible people were coming and going. Ghosts, I suppose. You could call them
ghosts. Or conceits. Ideas. Dreams. An idea of invisible people in my head. An
idea of invisible people in the invisible heads of invisible people.
The door of our
apartment is a continual fascination. It has a little peephole in it. If
somebody’s making a bunch of racket in the hallway you can see who it is. Once
I saw Abraham Lincoln doing his laundry. He looked abstracted, as always, and
obsessed with holding the so-called union together. He wore boxer shorts: red
hearts on a white background. On another occasion the Marquis de Lafayette paraded
back and forth in a sugar of profligate oscillation.
I am surrounded by
a mosaic of noise. There are sounds that are easily digested, and others that
lead to dreaming. I’m not at all sure how to define music. Does anyone really
know how to do that? Music is to sound what brass is to distillation. The drip
of whiskey into a big oak barrel.
Think of steam. Now
think of sarongs. And Malaysia. Time operates differently in different spaces.
Different geographies will vary translations of time. Sometimes you will see it
crawl over the knuckles of an arthritic hand, and on other occasions and in
other circumstances it will slide under the bellies of fish in scintillations
of light and shadow.
Why are spiders so
difficult to coax out of a bathtub? You’d think they’d be anxious to ride a
hand out of that porcelain into liberty. But they don’t. They skedaddle at the
least provocation.
If it’s hot enough,
I will put my running shirt on the porch railing to dry in the sun. Otherwise,
I have to take it out back and shoot it. I have buried a lot of running shirts.
One day their ghosts will arise from the drawer and dance in the darkness like
one of those old-timey cartoons of skeletons and cats.
One afternoon after
I hung my shirt on the railing I felt a young rain tree brush my skin.
Sensations are the
pixies of our lives.
Is it wise to
harbor so many generalities? Not when you’re my age. Deductions become
inductions. The redwood, bathed in light, touches the sky. A storm brews.
Lightning stumbles on an electron. I stop to ponder an elephant. The elephant
has been painted on the side of a barn, and is pink and happy with an upturned
trunk. When you’re young, everything is on arrival. When you’re old, everything
is on departure. The difference between them is not so large. The difference
between them is that of a muscle on bone, camaraderie in an airplane factory.
Light survives the
darkness. This is a daily occurrence. I get up, make the bed, go to the
bathroom, take a piss, look at my face in the mirror. My face trickles down the
mirror in beads of water. I remember looking younger. I remember that younger
person I used to be. I remember the highways that were traveled. The cars
driven and repaired. Gaskets replaced. Fan belts replaced. Too bad you can’t
replace a body so easily. Body work the mechanics call it. Medicine has a
different name for it: abnormality. You have an abnormality. I’ve known this my
whole life. Poetry is an abnormality. Poetry is a big abnormality. Poetry is a
huge abnormality. For which there is no cure. Except more poetry. More abnormality.
Adjectives are the
adipose tissue of the sentence. Fat. Adjectives can make a sentence fat. This,
for instance, might be considered a big fat sentence, an abnormality beginning
with a demonstrative pronoun and spitting blue fire from a mouth of ink and
memory.
I feel the kiss of
California. I speak to a canvas with a paintbrush dipped in a gob of blue. My
feelings waltz when I cross the border. When I enter a state of abandon, the
painting gets easier. The painting becomes goats. Cylinders. Forceps.
A willow grounds
the elasticity of dirt. The stream urges conference with the hills. The hills
confer with the sky. The sky argues back with rain.
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